Emotional Resilience- Control

Motivates helpful coping in any given situation. To feel like you can make the decisions according to your beliefs helps motivate you towards the goal/ overcoming an obstacle.

Two main components in identifying how to control a situation: 

Primary Control- ability to change a situation

Secondary Control-ability to be able to approach a certain situation. It involves finding the most positive way to approach a challenge you cannot fully change.

Secondary control is the control that you have over your attitude, regardless of the situation. Lance Armstrong's battle against cancer and hopelessness is an example of how maintaining a positive attitude through a difficult situation can make the difference.

Difficulty is recognizing when an obstacle/situation can be changed or accepted- find the “wisdom to know the difference.” It is not all that easy, sometimes you have to make difficult decisions and sacrifices in order to become ‘unstuck’ from a tricky situation.

An individual has a lot of control over how they react to stressful events, and have the some ability to choose how tough the path in overcoming the obstacle will be. This decision to work towards being more in control aids in the development of emotional resilience and well-being.

1) Knowing when to try to change a situation, and when to instead accept it.

2) Becoming courageous enough to make the changes you can make to improve your life, and

3) Learning how to manage your emotional reactions so that when you are faced with a difficult situation you cannot change, you are able to put the best possible face on that situation.

External factors may provoke emotional reavtions, but are not wholly determined by them.

Ultimately, you are the only person in control of how you react. Recognizing the power you have over your situation can greatly improve the way that you experience that situation.

Mills, H., Dombeck, M., June 2005. Emotional Resilience, MentalHelp.net (online). Available at: http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=5788&cn=298